I cannot believe that in 9 short days I will be in Zacapa beginning my adventure as a mission intern for 6 weeks!When I really think about it, I can't believe that I'm doing it at all. Looking back a year ago I would have never imagined that I would be preparing for this kind of experience. God works in crazy ways.This year in particular I have been continually reminded that He is in control and has plans for me that I could never have possibly thought up on my own.
Last summer working for youthworks I had the best summer of my life. I saw God work in ways I had never seen before, built incredible relationships with people I now consider my family, and made memories that will last forever. I LOVED living on the Blackfeet Reservation and was eager to return this summer. When I found out that I had to take summer classes for my masters program and therefore wouldn't be able to do youthworks again, I was absolutely devastated and tried to think of any possible way to get around it. Turns out that was impossible unless I wanted to completely change my future career plans. However, as much as I love good ol' Kville, staying here the entire summer was not my cup of tea. I managed to cram all my required classes in the first half of the summer and started praying for another opportunity. I began searching the web for anything I could find that would take me somewhere interesting where I could do some kind of mission work and play with cute kids. Mom suggested Guatemala so I filled out an intern application on a whim, not really expecting anything to come from it.
Obviously, God had other plans. While none of the other opportunities seemed to be feasible with costs, timelines, etc, CALMS (central american lutheran mission society) contacted me and said that they would love to send me there,so I began to get excited. But as I opened the email telling me my placement, my initial reaction was discouragement as I saw that I would be serving in a medical clinic near Amatitlan. I HATE blood. (And guts, scabs, puke, wounds, needles) Basically anything requiring medical attention makes me queasy so when I told my mom about the offer, I already had my mind made up that I wasn't going to take it. Clearly, my heart was not in the right place and at that point, I wasn't quite going for the right reasons but God chose to work through my selfish and stubborn self anyway. Mom had visited it on her leadership trip and told me that I would actually probably love it and really enjoy working with the children there. After much prayer and consideration, I decided that I felt that God was calling me to trust him to take me totally out of my comfort zone and I agreed to go after all.
Months later, after having gone on my spring break trip to La Fragua and falling in love with the country a bit, I was contacted once again by CALMS and told that I was being relocated for the summer to Zacapa where I would live at the Lutheran Boarding School and do work in La Fragua. Much more up my alley! This meant that I would get to go back to where I'd been, see familiar faces, and get to continue building relationships with those my church has already laid a foundation with. It has been amazing to see God's plan unfold through all of this.
I'm not 100% sure of what I will be doing while I'm there and probably won't know for sure until I actually arrive or possibly hours or minutes before I do it.I do know that I will be teaching english once a week to Ramiro, a man that I met on my trip who works for CALMS and his niece. I will also be doing things around the school, spending time getting to know the students and sharing God's word with them. In addition to those, since St. Marks goes to La Fragua twice a year, I am very excited to serve as a bridge between my home church and the community by furthering relationships. I'm going to get to visit all of the families that we have met and built houses before. Thankfully, there is also another intern going on the trip with me so we will get to figure this all out together!
Though all of these things sound amazing, I can't help but to have the thought in the back of my mind that I don't really speak much spanish. Yes, I took years of it in school, and yes, more came back to me on my trip than I thought would but that does NOT mean I am anywhere close to being able to fully communicate, much less lead devotions, prayers, etc. Though this is a rather terrifying concept, I am seeing this as another opportunity to learn to fully rely on God. Afterall, His strength is made perfect in our weaknesses, right? I trust that God has a plan and because of this, I have been given this position for a reason. He is a loving father and is not going to take me to Guatemala and leave me hanging, so I know that I will be equipped with the tools that I need.
As the days get closer, I have a lot to finish up here with my classes, tying up all the loose ends, and getting fully prepared to leave. I am so excited for this journey to start but as the trip gets nearer, my nerves also get much stronger. Please keep me in your prayers as I get ready to go,I'm going to need a bunch of them!I know that last year I started a blog and didn't actually keep up with it, but this time I intend to post in it as much as possible. 1. Because Miguel asked me to and 2. because I want to be able to share what God is doing around, in, and through me. I have gotten to witness the fact that God is already at work in Guatemala doing some extraordinary things. I know that God does not need me to do anything but I feel truly blessed that He allows me to be a part of it anyway and chooses to work through me despite the lack of what I have to offer. I told God that I wanted an adventure and boy, did He give me one! Please pray for me this summer as I learn to take His hand on this journey.
"For the Spirit who is in you is far stronger than anything in the world." 1 John 4:5
"Let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love. This is the only way we'll know we're living truly, living in God's reality. It's also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves." 1 John 3:18-20
"We live by faith, not by sight." 2 Corinthians 5:7
